Further updates and lots of good news

 So from my last post I was struggling too much to stick with all the supplements as they were causing so many awful side effects that I could not tolerate. Taking about 25 tablets, powders, oil every day plus living on such an incredibly restrictive diet simply was not worth it in the end for me. I came to a point where I just could not do it any more. I stopped all my supplements apart from CoQ10 and started eating a much more varied diet - but with minimal dairy and gluten to start with. The side effects from supplements stopped and to start with I was not getting increased pain despite eating more foods. But my pain levels have slowly increased - although I just cant for the life of me put my finger and which foods make it worse. Still my pain is definitely a lot less than before all of this. I do try to eat a lot of meals as I was whilst following the low lectin plan - such as scrambled eggs for breakfast, or choosing low lectin or gluten free options.  I am disappointed that no other symptoms improved and disappointed that it cost so much money to not get very far with improving my health when I tried so hard, and Michael put so much effort into cooking and shopping, but it is what it is. For now I will continue being careful with my food choices, attempting to keep lectins and oxalates lower but its not going to rule my life. 

Above - my Beauty of nature winning image SWPP

I would say that over the last few months I managed less than I was prior to starting the regime and I have been trying hard to slowly rebuild my activity levels. This has been hampered by an ongoing trapped nerve affecting my neck and shoulder, and more recently getting Covid. I am currently still recovering from Covid but know to build things up slowly and count myself  incredibly lucky not to have had it as bad as so many others.

Above - my 2nd place image in SWPP Beauty of nature competition

 One thing I have kept up from the regime the nutrition therapist suggested is mindfulness and meditation. This has become a very pleasurable part of my day and I can spend up to 2 hours a day meditating. I do find that it helps with pain and helps me to be more balanced and positive.

This summer I have put the rest of my energy into my photography as usual, this time creating still life images in our dining room and today I reaped the rewards of my time consuming efforts. Sometimes it could take me hours or days to create an image, slowly setting compositions up bit by bit and going back to it after a rest or maybe the following day, then getting lighting right one light at a time. It kept me occupied while I wasn't getting out and distracted me from the M.E symptoms and side effects of supplements. It was a great way to slowly learn how to do still life and I was happy to win a gold for one of the images with the SWPP and NPS. But that does not compare to todays surprise. 

One of my main aims was to be placed in the IGPOTY ( International garden photographer of the year) still life project for a 2nd year ( I had an image highly commended last year). Today the winners were announced and I feel incredibly honoured at having my images awarded 1st place, 3rd place, a finalist, a highly commended and 2 commended!!! Yes, you read right that was 6!!! images placed - I could not have imagined that in my dreams and was quite shocked but thrilled. It feels like a very special achievement to me. You can see all the winners here - IGPOTY Still life winners

Strangely this has occurred on the same day as another project I've been involved in, which I believe is fate as the publicity from the above may well help  with this. Last year I approached the M.E. association with a proposal that I supply them with images for free to enable them to create products to raise funds and this has finally resulted in the release of two calendars plus two sets of cards/notelets created from my photographs. I am very proud to be involved with this and will be encouraging people to buy them. They are themed as Animal magic and Flower power. So hopefully my success with the IGPOTY and any resulting publicity might help prompt extra sales if I can direct people interested in my work to the M.E. associations online shop. There is also a little bit about me in the M.E Associations magazine. M.E. Association website

Yet another bit of good news from my photography arrived this week, I  came first and 2nd in  the SWPP Beauty in nature competition  - totally unexpected and a lovely surprise. What a week! Very uplifting for sure and motivating me to keep slowly pushing ahead with my other projects and competition entries. I am now working on pulling together a portfolio and still aiming to produce images for a fellowship. Beauty of nature

Nutritional therapy and M.E. update

 Just a quick update on how the plan is going and how I am doing, more for my own records than anything.

So far pain is massively reduced, however  it can flare in the days following mental or physical exertion still - this is not a pain due to lack of use as it occurs in strange places such as across the cheek muscles in my face, plus usually accompanies further swelling of the glands in my throat and sore throat. The pain levels are still lower even on these occasions which is a massive plus. 

Frustratingly I have experienced a pinched nerve in my neck for the last  month so Im am unfortunately still experiencing pain - just a different sort - nerve pain through my shoulder, down my arm, accompanied by pins and needles/a dead arm sort of feeling. I have been practicing various neck exercises to help with this, used a Tens machine, heat pad, working on ensuring my posture is as good as it can be, altered how I work on a computer and how I sleep. So hopefully it will ease in coming weeks. I am taking Boswelia extract with Curcumin and black pepper to help reduce inflammation in and around the nerve to aid healing. One surprise to me is is just how much some meditation can actually help relieve the pain Im experiencing from the trapped nerve - I think this may be partially down to the position I practice in - but I have found one meditation to help a lot apart from when it reaches that excrutiating point. I would highly recommend meditation for pain relief - but look for one that suits you - some I find simply dont fit with me, whilst some are excellent.

As for all my other symptoms I would say little has changed, brain fog/cognitive dysfunction/memory problems persist and  fluctuate but can seriously interfere with my life and functioning, energy and stamina remain low, exhaustion/fatigue remains unchanged, flu like symptoms persist,  the sore throats and swollen glands in my neck occur less frequently which is a little improvement. Sleep disturbances persist. Post exertional malaise continues. The cold hands, feet, nose eases in the summer months anyway so difficult to assess but I remain intolerant to temperature fluctuations. I still experience fluctuating sensitivity to noise and light, as well as difficulty focusing my eyes.I  continue to struggle staying upright/on my feet for very long, with my balance remaining unstable - I have almost fallen several times at home recently. So not really any improvement over all other than pain reduction.

Recent blood tests show low ferritin at 32 ( possible aggravator mould) -but transferrin ok so not a supply issue but a storage issue ( all being used), low lymphocytes, high vit D, TPO ( Thyroid anti body) raised but less than it was years ago. TSH ok, T4 ok, T3 lowish and to be re checked in 6 months.

At present I am taking the following under supervision of my GP and nutritional therapist alongside following the plant paradox diet - ( PLEASE NOTE - this has been specifically worked out for me following medical history, tests, etc this is NOT a protocol for anyone else to follow. There are reasons I take each item and these are determined by specialists)

Morning -  Thyroxine,

 Betaine - for stomach mucosal lining and protein digestion, 

Ox bile - for digestive foundation, 

Molybdenam- for brain fog and sulphites

 Liquorice extract - for adrenal support and dopamine backlog

 Cod liver oil - omega 3 ,

 MCT oil - pure ketones in prep for keto diet plus brain fog

 Turkey tail powder - brain fog, 

Vitamin C - bio available vit c

CoQ10 - to aid mitochondria with energy 

Vit B 12 sub lingual

 Co enzyme B1 sub lingual - to help with multiple markers shown in OAT test

Acetyl L Carnitine - for brain fog

Lunch - Glucommanan powder - to bind mould - demonstrated in 2 tests

Tea - Betaine , Ox bile, P5P - to stop internal oxalate production, 

Bed time - Magnesium to aid sleep and pain relief plus Sleep aid herbal tablets as required

I am increasing MCT oil over the next week in preparation of trying a keto diet to hopefully kick start energy levels. Then starting DIM complex to help immune response indicated by low ferritin, increasing it over the following week.

Plan to continue with the nutritional protocol and other advised actions such as mindfulness, meditation, daylight, pacing etc and review in a few weeks as there is not an endless supply of funds and we simply cannot continue costs of nutritional therapist and so many supplements ( these alone are costing around £100 a month upwards) plus the cost of the diet. Fingers crossed we see some improvement. Its not easy following such a strict dietary regime with such a limited food choice when I dont have the energy to cook, and not easy on my partner either but we are both giving it our all and I am so grateful to Michael for cooking separate food for me ( he is not into this way of eating himself).

As always I try to balance the M.E stuff with some positives and whilst I have not been getting out much this last few weeks I have been dabbling with a bit of still life photography and thoroughly enjoying it. So those are the photographs shared today.

I offered use of some of my images to the M.E association to help them to raise funds and I have had an email saying they wish to take me up on this offer, images to be used on cards etc. I'm really happy to be able to contribute something to the M.E. community and do my bit to help raise funds for such an excellent association.

I also managed to get two images awarded gold from the NPS for May 

Update on diet

Well Ive been following the Plant paradox diet for almost 2 months now, with one 3 day break where I thought I would try introducing a few foods again then by my 3rd day I really regretted this decision to promptly reverted back to following the diet strictly. Ive been sticking to stage 2 of the plan and my brain fog is definately  reduced a lot, although its not completely gone - I definately still get it worse  post activity, so mostly M.E related connected to post exertional malaise. My cognitive functioning has improved a good bit too although Im still experiencing difficulty  with  tasks such as learning how to work something new or  problem solving. My memory remains poor and this doesnt seem to have changed. Overall I would say my cognitive functioning has improved maybe 20-30% some days, but unchanged other days and brain fog has improved by between 20% and 60% some days,  however this is extremely variable and some days it remains the same as it was. It is hard to say  if other factors may be affecting this such as poor sleep or PEM , or if it is diet related. Personally I feel it is down to a mixture of these and the diet has reduced these symptoms  helping me to function mentally a bit better than I was on some days.

My pain levels have definately improved since starting this diet, they increased substantially when I added foods back in for 3 days and reduced when changing back.  Although on trying to be more active I still get high levels of pain in the days afterwards regardless of diet or whether activity is paced and minimal or  increased a lot (for me - this could simply be having a shower, drying my hair and attempting to cook an easy meal in one day, doing an hours photography sat in the garden). But on days where I pace and keep my activity levels at  my regular normal amount then pain can be reduced by up to 75%( with the odd day of very little pain), on days where I do a little more it is probably still reduced by 30%, and active or post active days it remains pretty much as it has been. I did actually have two weeks of much lower levels of pain and  reduced my pain killers to almost stopping them, but then it increased again - partly because I was  being more active - it gets frustrating doing so little and it can be worth being in pain just to keep myself occupied or have a feeling that I have achieved something.

My sleep has improved a lot overall, apart from a couple of weeks and the odd night I have slept much better most of the time ( ? 70% of the time sleeping well) My fatigue levels dont feel any different to me and my energy levels  dont feel noticeably different, although my partner has stated that on observing me it appears as if I have a bit more energy and I appear to be managing a bit better. I cannot say that I feel a great deal different with both of these. I still struggle having a shower a have to sit on the side of the bath to dry myself and have just put on a dressing gown to absorb the water when too exhausted to dry myself. Im am still struggling to dry my hair most of the time. I have had a little bit more stamina walking around home some days, but this is not consistent, my legs still get wobbly, weak, jumpy and feel like Im walking on the moon at times.

I have noticed that Ive felt the cold less and my hands and feet have not been so cold as much - whether this is because  of warmer weather/higher temperatures or maybe Im better at preventing my hands and feet getting cold, or a combination of both. Plus due to the restrictions on leaving home due to the current pandemic Ive only actually been out on my scooter once in about 6/7 weeks or so - just a local exploration. So Ive not been outdoors as much as usual, which is where I feel the cold most, but I have been in our garden  probably about 3-4 days a week for up to an hour at a time.

My partner and I have decided to try phase three of the diet, but only introducing one food at a time. I will be trying tomatoes first - fresh, peeled, deseeded and pressure cooked to reduce lectins. This one food could make a big difference to my food options.  I have unfortunately been unable to buy pasture raised chicken and eggs, the pandemic situation has made it even more difficult to obtain many specialist foods, so I have settled for free range eggs and normal chicken - I suspect these have slightly negatively affected my brain fog again - Im going to monitor this over the next few weeks and if I think it is then I will just stop having chicken and try to get omega 3 eggs again ( there is only one place selling these and its miles away - we arent supposed to travel unless for essential reasons such as food, medical reasons etc and I doubt my reason of getting brain fog from normal eggs would be accepted as the shop selling them is a good ten miles or so away). But if lockdown is going to be for many months then I guess one trip a month should be out of the question given how limited my diet is. ( limited veg, wild fish, limited types of nut, extremely limited fruit and very little else)

Its been a very strange couple of months where life has changed for people around the whole world due to the Corona virus pandemic, in a way it has affected me a lot less than people living a normal life without an illness, as I have little choice but to spend pretty much most of my life at home. Whilst I would say I am mostly adjusted to this way of life, I was used to getting out for a drive most weeks with Michael and going for a ride on my scooter anywhere between twice a month and twice a week. Now I find myself in the strange position of worrying about being stopped if I go out for essential exercise as an able bodied person might not appreciate that I used a lot of muscles in using my scooter - especially as I generally use it in nature reserves on rough ground, this means it can sometimes be difficult just to stay on it!

 I use muscles in my back, my legs when I am going up and down slopes, my arms for steering and generally keeping the steering from veering the wrong way etc. Now to anyone who is fit and healthy this may be hard to imagine, but my muscles are wasted and weak, using my scooter for up to an hour can actually leave me exhausted for the next couple of days. Not just using it but there is the getting ready to go out, the walking to the car and back, the few steps I takes as I am exploring where I get off to look at a plant, insect or view etc. All this keeps my muscles from completely wasting - can I do this my moving round at home - not really. I cannot use the same muscles and dont intend to lose the level of functioning that I have as it can take months on end building any level of fitness back up with M.E. - Im still working on  rebuilding the level of activeness I used to have before my major crash over 20 months ago!  So I will be starting to attempt going out on my scooter locally (in the local streets and nature reserve one mile away) providing I can keep the social distance  from people- unfortunately there are many selfish and ignorant people who do not care if they pass the virus on and will walk right next to you - its not easy to get out of peoples way on a street path with a kerb on a scooter, so the wider paths on certain roads nearby or parts of the nature reserve will work best for me.

 I have been experimenting at home and in our garden with a cheap old Helios 44/2 lens which Michael kindly modified for me - I love the effect it has given( see the dreamy look above and below this paragraph) This is more pronounced when shooting at a shallow depth of field, but only a tiny area is in focus and this is tricky to achieve with manual exposure and other difficulties affecting peak exposure, but its been fun and I will continue to use it for floral work. I have a couple of magazines interested in publishing some of the resulting images.

I have also been producing more background images using this lens and have added these to my texture collection which I have decided to sell. I still need to work out how best to go about selling them as I have had some interest, but not sure its enough interest to make it worth while paying for a digital downloads shop online. Something for me to sort over the coming months.

Another reason it has been a strange month is birthdays -it has not only been my birthday, my partner Michaels birthday but my daughters 21st birthday - all in the middle of lockdown without being able to see anyone. Now I am used to this - Ive had many birthdays where Ive been unable to go out due to M.E - but I usually made it out within a few weeks but its hard for a young lady celebrating her 21st alone - literally seeing nobody, but we tried to make the best of it. In the weeks running up to her birthday I managed to get about 15 short videos from her friends and family especially for her birthday. The singer from one of her favourite bands agreed to create a video specially for her and sang two songs in it - this really made her smile. Then she had a long video chat with me followed by video chats with friends.

I actually had a birthday drink about a week or so following my birthday - my first alcoholic drink since New years day! I stopped trying to drink any alcohol after having reactions to it almost every time I tried - one or two mouthfuls of wine or ale would make me feel breathless with a racing heart and as if poison had been poured into my veins. It would settle and usually I could have a couple of pints after an hour or two but it wasnt enjoyable and was not worth it so I stopped drinking alcohol - not that I drank often, probably a couple of times a month. I decided to try a glass of mead and had no bad reaction at all so ended up having two glasses. I am allowed a glass of red wine on this diet so figured a small amount of mead occassionally cant be too bad - im pretty sure it doesnt have lectins, although the sugar content may be high, but I am allowed a spoonful of honey now and then, so its not that far from my diet.

I have two new Preying mantids now a Rain forest mantid and a Malaysian blue mantid which I was able to order with my regular live food delivery for my other pets. Theyre super cute - expect to see lots of photos over coming months.

The best made plans

Well I made it to my 5th week on the Plant Paradox diet before my plans of sticking to it became more difficult due to the most unusual and sad changes affecting the whole world now - Covid 19 - a new Corona virus which has spread round the world in a matter of months, resulting in thousands dying and life changing in ways that we in Britain haven't seen since world war 2. Due to the need for the majority of people being ordered to stay home by our government, to stop the spread of disease ( quite rightly so) there have been knock on effects in how we obtain shopping. If you are healthy you can take a trip to shops as infrequently as possibly to buy food or medication, but if you have an existing illness or are over 70 it is advised that you stay home, isolate and shield.  So this is what I am doing, and we are trying to avoid my partner going shopping as well. It has been incredibly difficult to get a full shopping list online - many items that are impossible to buy - such as the dairy free, sugar free, soy free coconut yoghurt that I get or omega 3/pasture raised eggs - which without I end up just eating fish and vegetables - not easy weeks on end! So I decided to stop following the diet during our current crisis and try again when things settle down.

However, after 3 days, on my 3rd day eating half Plant paradox diet, half normal food my symptoms really started getting worse again. In the month of following the diet my pain levels reduced around 75% most days - I think I only had about 5 days in a month where my pain levels were as they have been prior to this diet and now my pain has increased again. I think I had been a blase apart having pain again - but right now I want to stick to the Plant paradox diet again even though it means eating pretty much nothing other than restricted vegetables ( without lectins - so no tomatoes/peppers/potatoes etc), wild caught fish if we can still get it delivered, restricted nuts ( no peanuts or cashews), certain oils such as coconut/avocado or olive oil, coconut milk.  I think I will just have to try using free range eggs and hope for the best that my symptoms settle down again.

Symptoms helped by 4 weeks of the diet -
pain mostly reduced, also less stiff on moving around
 brain fog and actually being able to use my brain a bit - certainly not back to normal levels but definately much improved - although 3 days into stopping Im struggling to think again!
Sore throats - normally I have sore throats anywhere from 2-6 days a week - by week 3-4 on the plant paradox diet my sore throats only occurred once or twice a week ( it can literally last just a matter of hours)

Off the diet - by my third day off the diet and having lectins again, not only has my pain increase in amount/intensity but with frequency and in so many areas of my body. But I also noticed that the little jumpy, sort of electric shock/twitchy feelings I get in my muscles have suddenly increased and my body feels on high alert again. Writing this is incredibly difficult - I can hardly think of the words that I need - I am literally stopping every sentence or two - forgetting things, searching for my words and feeling mildly muddled/confused - I was not feeling this so much on the diet - it was not cured but I was able to think properly more frequently.

I cant write any more just now as my brain simply wont function, but Im going to try really hard to get the foods I need to stick to this diet - whilst I felt improvements werent massive and energy levels had not improved at all, ending up feeling in pain again with a sore throat every day and my brain not working, my muscles twitching away  is enough to make me get back to it. Although I need to get more inventive on recipes for fish and vegetables as it gets tedious. I want to write more - including stuff about our current situation but feeling too muddled and cant explain just how hard it has been just doing this much - I keep completely forgetting what I was writing and getting confused - stopping and coming back to it. Even struggling to add the images. I have some things I want to write about that I feel are important but I will just have to do it at a later date when my brain will work. How bloody frustrating this is - I had agreed to write an article for a magazine whilst my brain was working a bit better - hoping  it will function better back on the diet again.

On a plus side - I just got awarded 2 golds and 2 highly commended from the SWPP  which made my smile. I feel super lucky that I live somewhere with a garden where I can enjoy watching the flowers, insects and birds during this awful time.
Hoping everyone stays well and safe, thinking of all my lovely friends and family and sending love to you all.

Taking control

After 14 years of having M.E. and the medical profession/NHS pretty much failing big time in helping me ( and most other M.E. patients) to be well ( other than pacing), I have researched and tried many things to help me to be as well as I possibly can. I am not in denial of having M.E. Ive accepted it a long time ago, however there are many stories of people who have recovered or at least managed to get there health into a better state leading to having more of a life - in the last year a friend of a friend appears to be well on her road to recovery - through researching and changing things like nutrition. To see her photographs of her on holidays up in the hills etc gives me hope, and so this last few months I have been trying to find my own path to recovery yet again. 

As previously, I have looked at nutrition again and last year I came across a Dr Myhills book explaining how a paleo ketogenic diet can help the body to produce energy more efficiently. The diet involves cutting out dairy, gluten and grains, sugar, fruit sugar and high carbohydrate foods such as many root vegetables. The diet advocates eating the recommended protien for your body weight each day, keeping net carbs under 30 grams daily and eating more fats (particular fats such as extra virgin olive oil). I tried this for a couple of weeks last year and it made me feel so ill, on top of feeling dreadful with M.E. and triggered horrendous migraines so I thought maybe it just doesnt suit my body - and stopped it. I had my gall bladder removed 2 years ago, so I was concerned regarding my body's ability to digest such high amount of fats. I continued to read up on this and joined a group containing others with M.E. who have tried this diet - there were some who have had gall bladders removed who felt some benefit so I decided to give it another go, and try to persist. Given Dr Myhills 35 years of experience in treating patients with M.E. and her passion for helping us to get well, I felt her advice is most likely one of the best sources in the UK.

 So I found myself 5-6 weeks into this diet, feeling utterly dreadful, despite following it strictly, being in ketosis, eating all the supposedly right foods. On top of which I have been looking after myself - getting good sleeps ( Ive managed to improve my sleeping in the past 2-3 months) , careful planning and pacing, resting, avoiding/reducing stress, stopping drinking alcohol. I have spent most of my time at home this last 2-3 months, avoiding all most activities that would exacerbate my symptoms. I have taken all the recommended supplements to help mitochondria, energy production and immune system - CoQ10, NADH, Vitamin B12 sub lingual spray, Vitamin B6 & 3, flaxseed oil, evening primrose oil, magnesium, vitamin C, vitamin D, Carnitine. I stopped taking D ribbose whilst on the paleo keto diet as suggested in Dr Myhills book .

 A friend of mine had suggested I look at Dr S Grundy's The plant paradox and I thought I would take a peek. I came across a video of Dr Grundy in an interview and was extremely interested in his approach at helping people to recover from illnesses. In his research he has found that Lectins in foods are making many people unwell. Many plants produce lectins, Dr Grundy describes plants as producing lectins as a defense mechanism to ward off predators from eating them or their fruits/seeds. The lectins can cause a whole range of unpleasant symptoms and are present in so much of our food - even meat - as animals are being raised on grains ( often genetically modified and full of anti biotics which he states are also detrimental to our well being). So Dr Grundy advises a paleo type diet avoiding all foods containing lectins - and he has seen great results in his patients, so much so that he gave up his job as a heart surgeon to help people  get well using nutrition ( and other measures).

 Now whilst watching videos of Dr Grundy explaining his approach, I ate a spoonful of peanut butter as a snack. I had a relatively pain free morning, but in the hour following eating the peanut butter I developed pain throughout my body ( this is one of my frequent symptoms which I often cant put a finger on any cause). During a video he mentioned that peanuts contain lectin and can be one of the culprits to causing our symptoms - to avoid eating them. I had a light bulb moment and threw out my peanut butter :). Now it may just be coincidence that my pain occurred in the hour following eating this, but my gut feeling says its not. I decided right then to give his approach a good try.

 So today I have started his eating plan, with his 3 day phase one, having a nice green smoothie for breakfast. What I like about Dr Grundy is that, like Dr Myhill, he is making a lot of this information public so that people can try it themselves, unlike some clinics with secretive approaches who charge the earth - when people who are very ill with M.E. dont have incomes and simply cannot pay for this vital information to help them to get well.

My green smoothie consisted of a handful of rommaine lettuce, a handful of spinach, juice of half a lemon, half an avocado, fresh mint, and stevia/pure vanilla extract to taste - all whizzed up with water. Its surprisingly nice - and a fresh way to start the day.

For this altered diet to work its important to only  eat wild caught fish, pasture raised poultry that has eaten natural insects and plants - not been fed grains/antibiotics, grass fed meats where the animal has not been given grains/antibiotics. Now these are not the easiest things to find locally in the UK. and they not cheap - but I would rather give up everything to pay for the right food and opportunity to be well again, or at least  less ill. Luckily I live near the sea and a fish quay, my partner is going out hunting today for the right meat/fish. Im fairly confident that I should be able to get wild caught fish from local fishermen.

Last year I also tried cognitive behavioural therapy partially to see if it would help with my PMDD ( pre menstrual dysphoric disorder) and partially to help with M.E. I learned nothing new that I didnt know from being a nurse. But it led to a next treatment idea for the PMDD which is currently working well for me - despite my Dr not having a clue about this treatment, I quite literally had to explain the latest treatments to her. I now take Fluoxetine on the very first day of any symptoms for around 7 days, it helps me within 48 hours ( unlike the usual action of this drug which takes weeks or months) It isnt working as an antidepressant but it can allieviate symptoms rapidly. My whole life I have struggled with these symptoms not knowing it could be helped until last year - quite ironic that I start treatment as I start the whole perimenopause. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3442940/
But reducing my stress levels by getting the right treatment for PMDD is something that can help the M.E.

What I have managed to do is find my own ways to reduce stress, stop being a worrier and find peace of mind - I continue to strive to improve with reducing stress - its a work in progress, although I have just recently dealt with one of life's most stressful events relatively easily due to my new approaches. I use a lot of positive thinking strategies which are found in abundance on youtube.

 Another thing I tried last year was Acupuncture - from a lovely lady who has helped herself to better health following M.E. Now I do feel that timing was not good an I was on the brink of going through two very stressful things ( moving home etc) so I believe this may have affected my body's response. I attended numerous sessions, but  varying reasons resulted in difficulties in having a regular weekly session. My practitioner is a wonderful lady and I feel that at some point I would like to revisit and see if she can help me further, but at  that point last year I was not seeing signs of improvement - I really do think this was highly likely due to other factors and that if I can try it again now I might see some results, but feel other negative forces hampered my progress.  I did find that the acupuncture helped me on my path to sleeping better and also helped me to reduce stress. I had no choice but to stop treatments due to financial restraints, it is what it is -but I can see me trying to determine ways to pay for treatment in the future. The treatments brought me peace and calm at a time that was highly stressful and Im very grateful for the practitioners efforts. TBC

So towards the end of last year I moved into my wonderful partners home, I cannot express just how amazing he has been regarding the M.E. and helping to find a way forward to promote my best chance at recovery or being as well as I possibly can. He helps me with anything and everything that I struggle with, he prevents me from getting worse by doing all the cooking etc. I have been so incredibly lucky to find someone who is such a rock. I really feel that we are on this journey together and that he is holding my hand as we walk through it, negotiating the twists and turns  as just a different sort of life adventure. Michaels support has enabled me to use what little energy I have each day/week/month to do things I love instead of making myself ill doing housework and cooking, resulting in never managing to do what I love. So most weeks we go out on a drive somewhere nice and if Im up to it we explore a park/nature reserve/coastal path with me on a mobility scooter. When Im not getting out I use our dining room as a sort of mini studio to take photographs of flower etc - its all set up so that even if I only have a little energy all I need to do is sit at the table and snap away - with everything I need within reach.

Earlier in the year I had decided that when I struggled to get out I would concentrate on something positive to help me get through it, which is when I decided on doing mostly macro photography at a table top, sat down. I gave myself big goals - Ive always believed that if you believe you can do something then you can. So my aims were to try to get an image placed in the International garden photographer of the year and to do my best in the SWPP and NPS competitions as entering each month gives me a little something to focus on when stuck at home the majority of the time.
Well I didnt get placed, however I am really happy to have had a couple of images shortlisted in the macro section and to get my portfolio shortlisted. The images of the lady bird above and below  are part of that portfolio.

These next images were also shortlisted

I did even better in the National photograph society's monthly competition, being awarded a total of 22 gold awards and 41 highly commended - which landed me one of my proudest photography achievements to date - only last week I was announced overall Photographer of the year for the NPS - which is a massive achievement for me. I really hope that others with M.E. reading my blog manage to complete reading the whole blog and realise that even though ill and pretty much stuck at home for 95% of life it is still possible to make positive things happen - if you put your mind to it. This hasnt been easy - Ive suffered after every mini photo session and the majority of it has been done sat at a table at home. I started learning photography 13 years ago after getting M.E. and Im mostly self taught, having used the most basic, cheap equipment for many years, but perseverance and determination has got me to this point. So I just want to say to others with this horrible illness to keep going, and find ways to adapt, look for the most positive way forward that you can find at that time in your life and take things one step at a time.
Many of the images included are images awarded by the NPS. A few were also awarded by the SWPP.

I will try to update soon on my progress

My wonderful partner Michael - this one was awarded a gold too :)